Sorry sorry sorry for harping on about this, but for reasons I feel I can be forgiven for, this is a hot topic for my mind!
I have to confess: I have about six close male friends, and I've kissed all of them, after we became friends. Well, I have been a willing participant kissing five of those. The sixth was a totally one sided kiss (his sided), and I quickly put a stop to it. But my point is this: there has always been a certain sexual attraction in these friendships. And now I am wondering if this is inevitable, and do you know, I think it might well be. After all, it makes sense, doesn't it? You need to like someone to be friends with them, and in a way I am attracted to my female friends too - I find them amusing, kind, I think that they're attractive and find it perfectly understandable that every sane man in the world would be lucky to have them as a gilfriend; so the same is true with male friends. But there are less safety catches in this situation to stop things from heading out of Friend Land and into Big Mistake Land. With my female friends there just isn't that same level of flirtation that comes so easily when I'm with a member of the opposite sex. And when you do find someone amusing and kind, and think they're attractive, and then you add alcohol into a situation, and dim lighting, and, well, sometimes things happen.
This makes me sound very shallow, but I'm trying to express the opposite. I think I'm trying to say that I think sexual attraction is probably always a factor in a cross gender friendship (if you're both hetrosexual, or maybe even if not), or was a factor, or will be a factor at some point. For one of you or both of you. And I just have to learn to deal with it in a much better way than I ever have before. Sigh. Growing up is pants.
